My Beloved Oppressor — Chapter 61

my dear friend catherine,

the front lines were pushed back, so i received your letter much later than expected.

i'm sorry if i worried you.

i'm currently in recovery at portsmann hospital. i was so worried when i heard about seinshire.

i called but couldn't reach you by phone.

are you alright? i hope you're safe.

my ex-husband and i... went through some things lately. rereading your letter has been very helpful.

i know that going our separate ways and ending things completely is the best for both of us.

but then i realized something on the brink of death.

i had never once truly had a proper conversation with him.

and i deeply regretted that.

i know that having a proper conversation won't necessarily solve everything.

but i do believe that it may be an opportunity to make a better choice.

just like that time in the winter,

when the two of us had that conversation

at the reception room.

if i don't take this opportunity, i think i'll regret it for the rest of my life.

i must thank you for encouraging me.

once i'm discharged from the hospital, i'll be released from military service. i'll stop by seinshire on the way back.

i look forward to seeing you, bruner, and my dear olivia again.

please take care until we meet, catherine.

With Love,

Annette Rozenberg.

Episode 61

HEINER APPARENTLY DIDN'T RESPOND TO MY REQUEST.

I DON’T KNOW IF THAT'S HIS WAY OF REJECTING ME, BUT...

I'VE DECIDED TO SIT BY THE LOBBY ANYWAY,

SINCE THERE'S A CHANCE THAT HE MIGHT PASS BY

WHEN HE GOES FOR A WALK, OR GETS DISCHARGED.

BESIDES, BEING IN AN OPEN LOBBY FEELS BETTER,

THAN STAYING IN A CLOSED HOSPITAL ROOM...

WELL, WELL, LOOK WHO IT IS.

AH.

GOOD AFTERNOON.

IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I'VE SEEN YOU.

HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? HOW IS YOUR HEALTH?

I'M ALMOST FULLY RECOVERED. I'LL BE DISCHARGED SOON.

BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME, HOW ARE YOU?

YOU LOOK QUITE PALE.

I'M ALRIGHT. IT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE I HAVEN'T BEEN SLEEPING SO WELL.

YOU'RE NOT SLEEPING WELL?

I'VE BEEN HAVING SOME RESTLESS NIGHTS...

THAT'S UNDERSTANDABLE.

IT WOULD BE STRANGE IF YOU WERE FINE AFTER GOING THROUGH THAT.

BUT WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE LOBBY?

AH, I'M...

I'M JUST WAITING FOR SOMEONE.

WAITING? WHEN ARE THEY COMING?

WELL...

I'M NOT SURE IF HE'LL EVEN BE COMING.

HMM.

...WHEN I WAS YOUNG, I RECEIVED NEWS THAT MY HUSBAND, WHO WAS WORKING ABROAD, HAD PASSED AWAY.

AT FIRST, I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT AND JUST WAITED, BUT...

EVENTUALLY, I REMARRIED,

BECAUSE I COULDN'T SUPPORT THE CHILDREN ON MY OWN.

BUT ABOUT SIX MONTHS AFTER THAT, MY HUSBAND CAME BACK ALIVE.

IT WAS A MIRACLE, BUT IT ALSO COMPLICATED THINGS.

AFTER ALL, I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY SECOND HUSBAND'S CHILD AT THE TIME.

REMARRYING WAS THE BEST CHOICE I COULD MAKE THEN, BUT I DO REGRET IT.

HOWEVER, NO MATTER WHAT CHOICE I MADE, I THINK I WOULD'VE HAD REGRETS.

ALL WE CAN DO IS MAKE THE LEAST REGRETTABLE CHOICE.

IF YOU'VE DECIDED TO WAIT, THEN WAIT.

WAIT SO THAT YOU WON'T HAVE ANY REGRETS LATER.

AH.

I HAVE NO STRENGTH IN MY HANDS...

WHAT SHOULD I DO?

WHAT'S THE POINT IN ALL OF THIS...

AH.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

WHAT...?

WHAT ON EARTH IS THE PROBLEM NOW?

ARE YOU TRYING TO PICK A FIGHT WITH ME?

I'M NOT...

YOU'RE NOT WORKING ON YOUR REHABILITATION,

AND YOU'RE SITTING IN THE LOBBY ALL DAY. WHAT ELSE COULD THAT BE IF NOT A PROTEST?

I DO GO TO THERAPY EVERY DAY.

DON'T LIE TO ME.

I KNOW YOU'RE NOT SERIOUS ABOUT IT.

IT'S TRUE THAT I'M NOT MOTIVATED.

MY HAND IS A LOST CAUSE ANYWAY...

...IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT. I'VE JUST BEEN WAITING FOR YOU.

IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE ME, I CAN MAKE IT BRIEF...

EVER SINCE WE MET AGAIN, YOU'VE ALWAYS CALLED ME "COMMANDER".

AND NOW, YOU'RE DROPPING FORMALITIES...

ISN'T... THIS EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANTED?

YOU SAID WE SHOULD NEVER MEET AGAIN.

THAT'S WHY I'M TRYING TO LET YOU GO--

I JUST WANTED TO SAY THANK YOU.

...FOR COMING TO SAVE ME, AND...

I ALSO WANTED TO SAY THAT I'M SORRY.

THERE'S... NO NEED FOR YOU TO SAY THAT.

IT'S UP TO YOU WHETHER YOU ACCEPT MY THANKS OR APOLOGY.

I JUST WANTED TO TALK, THAT'S ALL.

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU SUDDENLY WANT TO TALK WITH ME, BUT...

LET'S STOP--

I MET CAPTAIN ELLIOT SIDOW.

HE SAID HE WAS YOUR FORMER COLLEAGUE.

...JACKSON.

I NEVER EXPECTED TO HEAR HIS NAME UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES.

ACCORDING TO THE TESTIMONIES OF THE SURVIVORS,

A FRANZEAN CAPTAIN INTRODUCED HIMSELF AS AN OLD FRIEND OF THE COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF.

I’M NOT SURE WHAT EXACTLY THE TWO OF THEM COULD’VE TALKED ABOUT...

...AND? DID HE TELL YOU ABOUT MY PAST?

I'D HOPED ANNETTE WOULD UNDERSTAND MY PAST, BUT AT THE SAME TIME... I DIDN'T WANT HER TO FIND OUT.

DO YOU FEEL SORRY FOR ME NOW?

BECAUSE IF YOU KNEW, I'D WANT TO PUT EVERYTHING ASIDE AND HOLD ONTO YOU.

DESPITE ALL MY EFFORTS TO PUT EVERYTHING TO AN END,

I END UP IN THIS MISERABLE, WRETCHED STATE.

SOMEHOW, IT ALWAYS TURNS OUT LIKE THIS.

YOU ALWAYS HAVE YOUR WAY.

I HAVE NEVER WON AGAINST YOU. NOT EVEN ONCE.

HEINER, DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT I SAID BEFORE?

I SAID THAT I REFUSED TO UNDERSTAND YOU BECAUSE I LOVED YOU.

BECAUSE TRYING TO UNDERSTAND YOU WILL ONLY HURT US BOTH.

BUT AFTER HEARING YOUR STORY FROM CAPTAIN SIDOW,

FOR THE FIRST TIME, I REGRETTED AVOIDING YOUR PAST.

I SHOULD'VE PROPERLY ASKED YOU, AT LEAST ONCE.

I SHOULD'VE LISTENED TO YOU.

HEINER.

DID YOU HATE ME,

JUST BECAUSE I WAS THE DAUGHTER OF MY FATHER, MARQUESS ROZENBERG?

THERE ARE THINGS YOU KNOW ONLY WHEN THEY'RE SAID ALOUD.

AND THERE ARE THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW.

SO MANY THINGS HAPPENED TO US,

AND WE WERE TOGETHER FOR A LONG TIME.

WE CAN'T CONTINUE PRETENDING AS IF NOTHING HAPPENED.

EVEN IF THIS RELATIONSHIP HAS SHATTERED TO PIECES,

AND CAN NO LONGER BE REPAIRED...

EVEN IF NOTHING CHANGES BETWEEN US,

I DON'T WANT TO HAVE ANY MORE REGRETS IN MY LIFE.

HEINER.

WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOUR FEELINGS FOR ME?